Maybe...

Sharkbutt!

Linus is an old man. So his teef are not the best. He is orange, like Stripey.
I think maybe I'm salty.
Dont cats like salt? Its like kisses except his breath smells like poo a lot so...

Evelyn

Hi Evelyn,
How you? How you teef? Linus is orange and old like Puppy D, and foodchik too. You prolly salty on you eyes. Cats mostly like salt, but our food is so salty that foodchik eat it instead of popcorn. But it salty so Stripey doesn't forget how to pee. Him simple like a box of hair.
Have a happy day,
your frend,
Sharkbutt